Earsdropping: on a meet-cute
When we visit Sylvia’s parents, she picks out a romantic comedy double feature as part of my indoctrination into the family. Her father, Ron, known for his avid rom-com consumption is there to join as we ooo and aww at Julia Roberts and Sandra Bullock finding love in a bookstore or a subway tollbooth. They were doing it long before the Lifetime channel. These romantic comedies that we watch with her father, henceforth known as Ron-Coms, have exposed me to a feeling that I avoided in my younger years — yet completely embodied — the sappy hopeless romantic. This past holiday, we watched When Harry Met Sally…, as an homage to Rob Reiner’s legacy. The thematic scenes that directed my attention were the stories shared by old couples about how they met. The long-lived lovers recollected fondly the moment that they knew they were meant to be. There was something so plain about their words as they shared descriptive details directly to camera about the place they were at when their eyes first met, but the sincerity behind their words carried a passion and conviction that compelled the mundane moment. As an homage to this collection of scenes and a nod to David Sedaris’ absurd amalgamation of animal love and other stories, Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk, I have earsdropped on some of my own tales of first infatuation.
The Gnomes
He was a gnome. She was a gnome. Can I make it any more obvious? They met at a sock store grabbing for the same flower-patterned hosiery. He insisted that she have it, and she insisted that he. It was a polite standoff and gnome wins. In the end, they decided to split the pack and the rest was history. It’s funny that you meet your partner for life when you least expect it. Who would’ve guessed that they both shop for hats at the same sock store.
The Techies
This May-December romance may have never been if they didn’t get outside of their box. They grew up at different times and believed they wouldn’t have anything in common to talk about. But a mutual friend, a CD, insisted that they just give it a spin and see what happens. One learned how to press the right buttons and the other learned all you needed to do was have a pencil to turn back time. They felt like kids again in their own respect, and would giggle together as a smartphone walked by with its cord dangling out of its port.
The Mice
They wouldn’t realize it immediately, but they were a match made in heaven. It wasn’t until their third date that lightning struck. They were at the top of a ferris wheel after winning stuffed animal prizes for each other at the ring toss, and it started to rain. Thunder cracked and the wind wailed, they held each other close. They got down safely and sighed with relief. From that day on, no matter what little things came up, nothing bothered them, ate at them, not a pick or a chew.
The Chairs
Although they are in a bit of a rut right now because things are too comfy, they used to really wow each other. In fact, that’s how they met. They both joined a Cirque du Soleil class, looking to get a good workout, improve their balance, and meet new people. When they were instructed to stack on top of each other in a handstand move to illustrate for the class, they both blushed a deep maroon. In the act, hand-in-hand, they locked eyes and knew they couldn’t stand a second longer without each other.
The Swingers
They are new parents. No sleep and feeling chained up are all they know right now. Plus, people are asking questions, like “why is your child made of wood unlike the both of you?” and “why does your child contain a squirrel?” They just want to go back to the early days that were more extreme and carefree. Their first date was bungee jumping. And now, they feel stuck. No matter which direction they go, there’s a gravitational pull always bringing them back, side-by-side, in the same place.
The Pestos
You wouldn’t guess it by looking at them, but they couldn’t be more different. Sure, they came from the same type of family and were brought up the same way, but one yearns for frolicking on the beach and the other prefers a mellow day overloading on carbs. Still, they do have good times. Early on, they discovered that if they mix together who they are and get a little bit cheesy, they really can make each other laugh.